Captain Rex Influence

I have to hand it to my daughter, she's definitely something else. Growing up, I was never into the whole princess scene especially as I got older. Amazingly, my daughter isn't either. She's more into boy things and doesn't want to be pretty. I've had somewhat of a problem accepting this because I think she is so beautiful. When she was little, I'd love dressing her up in these beautiful dresses and getting her hair all prettied up. Now she won't wear dresses and will only either have her hair down, or up in a ponytail. So today for Characters Day at school she wanted to be Captain Rex from the Clone Wars in Star Wars. Fine, I thought. As I was driving her off at school this morning, I saw all these pretty little girls in their faries and princess outfits and, yes I hate the princess scene - I would love to see her in one of those outfits...at least once.

Take The Easiest Road...

Sometimes I think that people take the easiest road, the road that doesn't require lifting a finger or going outside their realm of comfort. I knew for about a week that there were two American men and two Guatemalans who needed a place to stay for 4 days for Operation Club Foot. The two Americans were living in a monestary in Guatemala and the two Guatemalans consisted of a mother and a daughter with two club feet. They traveled 10 hours by bus to bring the mother and daughter here to Tegucigalpa.

On Friday, I seriously thought about housing them during this time. Totally thought about it, and damn it, the honest truth is that - and I hate to say this, and I cringe when I think about it - it was inconvenient for me and my family. Ugh, there I said it. I totally could have housed them. We have a huge basement downstairs, but I was thinking about all the things I have to do this week... the children's activities, working, this and that, and blah, blah, blah. Since I don't have a live-in housekeeper, I would have to physically be at home each and everytime they left the house or returned. And I just wasn't prepared for that responsibility. I've had Peace Corps volunteers stay at our house before, but that's usually one night.

Ok, so that's my confession. It doesn't make me feel better, especially since I actually met them today and they are sooooo nice! I could have totally kept them at our house, no problem, but no, I choice the easiest road. Instead they stayed at the hospital housing the first two nights, then stayed at a low-end motel last night and tonight. Ugh, I hate myself sometimes.

Visiting San Felipe - a little guilt...

I visited San Felipe for Operation Club Foot yesterday. I did something that I am not proud of. I thought I'd donate 200+ slinkies and three bags of clothes that my son doesn't fit anymore. But the question was, since there were so many parents there, who would I give the clothes to? Eventually, three moms gathered around me asking, in an almost demanding way, for some clothes for their daughters. I told them repeatedly that I only have boy clothes to give and they kept saying that they'd like clothes for their daughters and I got a little irritated and I raised my voice and said, "I only have boy clothes!" And they nodded their heads and kind of backed off. I gave them the clothes that I had, even though some were blue. I felt bad for raising my voice, but I just needed some space. And I felt like they weren't saying please or anything, which was probably why I was a little irritated. It's almost like they were expecting me to give them something, like I had to give them something. In the end though, they said the words that I was looking for - Gracias. That word always makes things a little better.

Twitter...

It's bad enough that I have an unmanageable addiction to Facebook, but still I signed up for Twitter. I'm not even close to being addicted to Twitter as I am to Facebook. In some ways, I find it annoying really. But this morning came a new low. What kind of world are we living in when I just twittered that I'm eating a bowl of Koala Crisp cereal? Scary.

American Idol Already?

Ok, so my good friends know that I'm totally in love with David Cook, in a "I totally respect him as an artist" way. And he's kinda hot, but not Brad Pitt or David Beckham hot, but omg-your-voice-is-so-unbelievable-hot (and I'm not even going to mention about his guitar skills). After last season he started dating a former American Idol contestant and I'm like whatever. Catty high school Portia came out and I was like, he can totally do better...(me. Ha, just kidding. Seriously. Just kidding). So today I found out that the two broke up. Well, I'm kinda indifferent to tell you the truth, but still - damn it, what was my point of this whole blog? Whatever. I drank several cups of highly caffeinated tea AGAIN and my thoughts are racing a million miles per second - totally going ADD here...

And wow, today starts the new American Idol season. I've always been a fan, but David Cook isn't on it this season nor will there be a David Cool replacement, so I'm not that interested. I'll probably still watch it.

Come Look At This - *end scene*

Every now and then there's a weird scene in a movie where a character gets approached by another character who doesn't really know that him/her very well. Then all of a sudden, that person starts revealing something that you would only tell your most trusted friend or relative. And you're thinking, "that doesn't happen in real life" and the whole movie is pretty much ruined. But today something like that happened.

There's a guy that works on my floor who I have always thought to be super nice. He's told me things about his family that I'm sure he hasn't told anyone before and I just smile and try not to offer any advice because I don't know him that well. Today, I stopped by his office for a work related question. We talked about that for a while. Then I asked, "How are you doing?" and he looks around and says, "Come here. You're my friend so I can show you this." I'm thinking...unrealistic movie scene! He takes something from his desk and asks me to read it. It is an official notice from his boss saying this and that about his past work conduct. There were some serious stuff in there and I'm like...hmm, I can't believe he's showing me this. I talked with him a bit and listened. I realized that people just need people to listen to them sometimes. So that's what I did.

So I went back to my office and I see 2 or 3 folders from women desperate to work as a nanny or housekeeper. Each folder has letters of recommendation and copies of their idenfication cards. I'm looking at these unemployed women's ID cards and I'm feeling super bad for them of course. Last summer my dad lost his job after almost 15 years with the same company. He's living off unemployment - for how long, I don't know. He rents a modest living space in Central California. He's doing ok, given the situation. At least he gives off that impression. But these women who are in their 40s and 50s can't be doing too well. I wonder to myself, "how are they living" without any money? It's not like they get unemployment. Are they just sitting there in their homes, waiting and praying that someone will call them so can feed their families? It just breaks my heart.

Speaking of which, we're getting closer and closer to our moving date back to the United States. Instead of being completely happy about this (well, don't get me wrong...I AM extemely happy), I'm feeling very sad about leaving our helpers, especially the older one who has been with us for almost 4 years and takes care of my son like he were her own (a fact that, to be honest, bothers me a little bit). I'm repeatedly asked by people, "why don't you take her to United States?" And I just can't give them a good reason why I don't want to. I guess it's mainly because I want to be a mom again. A full-time mom. Something I totally enjoyed raising my oldest daughter. Although she doesn't live with us, she knows my son too well. She knows when it's time for him eat, shower, play, sleep. Everything. And if she goes with us to the United States, I can't be the mom that I want to be. The mom who I was with Miadora. I'd be "that" mom. And I'm not entirely convinced that she would be completely happy living with us anyway. When she went with me in California last year for a month and a half, it was the first time that it was she was living with us. She cried a lot because she missed Honduras. I totally understand. I think I am making the right decision with this. I just dread that day when we have to say goodbye to her. I don't want to see her saying goodbye to my son. I know it's going to break her heart.

On the plus side, I am making sure that she will never have to clean a single house after we leave. Last year I gave her a brand new sewing machine and a month ago, I bought her 8 or 9 patterns so she can make clothing and sell that instead and get a business going. I have told her to find out more about sewing classes so she can perfect this art. I don't care how much it is or what the schedule is. I want her to take those classes. Also her daughter (a former part-time nanny of my daughter) bought a pulperia (a dream for many Hondurans!) and we are helping with that as much as possible. I want them to have businesses and other means of income, so that they don't end up like the women in the folders sitting on my desk. I know they will be fine and I will continue to keep in touch with them. We are even making arrangements so that she can visit us several times while we are living in the States.

More Organic Cookies

I'd have to say that as far as shopping goes, Tegucigalpa isn't too bad. I've always been really into organic and natural food products and when I moved here almost 4 years ago, I was worried that I would not be able to find too many of the products my family and I normally eat. But I have found that I am able to order a lot through the commissary shipment, online, and sometimes I'll even find them here in the city at places like Pricesmart, Mas Por Menos and Cafe Honore...at an inflated price. But usually when I come back to the United States, I'll bring a whole bunch of organic products back. Last time I was in California, back in the summer, I brought back several boxes of organic snacks and cookies for the children. I've noticed that I'm on my last box! And this particular product that my kids love is from Safeway's O Organics, and they do not ship online of course. I haven't done this in a while, but I guess I'll have to ask my mom to buy them and ship them to me. I normally avoid this because it gets pretty expensive with the shipping (even though my mom won't even think of accepting payment from me).

Now that I think about it, I wonder if I should just get Earth's Best instead? They have organic cookies that my kids love as well, plus other the cereal bars that have 25% iron in each one. Since Timmy isn't a huge meat eater, this helps a lot. More importantly, they ship APOs!

My Son Needs A Haircut

My son is 19 months old and he still hasn't had his haircut yet. I really think he needs one because his hair is down to below his shoulders and his bangs are starting to bother his eyes. But, I love his curls! I've read that when you but a baby's curls, it may not grow back curly. I have several reasons why I'm postponing his first haircut:

1) The curls issue (again, I love his curls)
2) What style would I do? A total buzz cut, or just a few inches off so he can at least keep some of his curls?
3) Where would I go? I don't know too many family salons here in Teguc. Yes, I know they exist, I just don't know where! And for his first haircut, I'd really like to take photos with my good camera, but here I'm not supposed to have cameras out for safety reasons. I'll still take photos, but be very vigilant about it.